CHAPTER 3

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Infancy: Physical and Cognitive Development

In Chapter 2 I talked to Kim at the beginning of the third trimester, anxiously waiting for her child’s birth. Now, let’s pay her a visit and meet Elissa, her baby girl.

She’s been here for 5 months and 10 days, and I feel like she’s been here forever. For me, it was love at first sight and, of course, the same for Jeff. But the real thrill is watching a wonderful person emerge day by day. Take what’s happening now. At first, she couldn’t care less, but about a month ago, it was like, “Wow, there’s a world out there!” See that baby seat? Elissa can make the colored buttons flash by moving her legs. When I put her in it, she bats her legs like crazy. She can’t get enough of those lights and sounds. Now that she is finally able to reach, notice her hunger to grab for everything and the way she looks at your face—like she can get into your soul. Sometimes, I think she understands what I’m feeling . . . but I know she must be way too young for this.

Elissa doesn’t cry much—nothing like other babies during the first three months. Actually, I was worried. I asked the doctor whether there was something wrong. Crying is vital to communicating what you need! The same is true of sleeping. I’m almost embarrassed to tell you that I have the only baby in history who has been regularly giving her mom a good night’s sleep since she was 2 months old.

Breast-feeding is indescribable. It feels like I am literally making her grow. But, here I also was concerned. Could I do this? What helped me persevere through the painful first weeks was my supportive husband—and most important, the fact that Jeff makes enough money to let me take off work for five months. I feel so sad for my friend, Nora, who had to abandon this incredible experience when she needed to go back to her job right after her son’s birth.

Pick her up. Feel what it’s like to hold her—how she melts into you. But notice how she squirms to get away. It’s as if she is saying, “Mom, my agenda is to get moving into the world.” I plan to YouTube every step now that she’s traveling into life.

At five months of age, Elissa has reached a milestone. She is poised to physically encounter life. This chapter charts the transformation from lying helplessly to moving into the world and the other amazing physical and cognitive changes that occur during infancy—that magic first two years of life.

To set the context, I’ll first spell out some brain changes (and principles) that program development. Then, returning to infancy, I’ll chart those basic newborn states—eating, crying, and sleeping—and track babies’ emerging vision and motor skills. The final sections of this chapter tour cognition and emerging language, the capacity that makes our species unique.