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What influences our choice of a romantic partner?

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One important factor is proximity or nearness.

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Although we are sometimes “swept off our feet” by a stranger,

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we usually select mates from the group of people with whom we are familiar

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such as the people we associate with at school, on the job, or in our communities.

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Another factor is similarity.

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The proverb “opposites attract” may sometimes seem true in terms of surface personality traits

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but it rarely holds true at a deeper level.

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People generally choose mates who are similar to them on a variety of dimensions

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including physical characteristics such as height, weight, and race

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as well as education, intelligence, and religious and political attitudes.

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But we can’t overlook the importance of physical attractiveness.

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Good-looking people (as defined within each society) have an advantage, at least in the early stages of a relationship.

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One study matched college students with attractive or unattractive “blind dates”

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both males and females paired with attractive dates

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reported liking their dates more than those paired with unattractive dates.

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Though we may prefer to date someone who is very attractive

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in the end we generally choose mates who are similar to us in physical attractiveness.