Self-awareness is the ability to view yourself as a unique person, distinct from your surrounding environment, and to reflect on your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors—in short, asking yourself, “Who am I?” (Rochat, 2003).

But self-awareness isn’t only about inward analysis. You also look outward, to others, and compare yourself to them. Through social comparison, you assign meaning to others’ behaviors and then compare their behaviors against your own. Think of times you’ve wondered about your own speaking abilities after seeing a classmate deliver a stellar presentation or pondered your interpersonal skills after watching a sibling comfort a friend. When you stack up favorably against people you admire, you think well of yourself (“I’m as fast as the black belts in my karate class!”). When you don’t compare favorably, you think less of yourself (“Why can’t I be as funny as my brother?”).

When communicating, you are always self-aware, constantly considering your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. But to improve your communication, you must routinely practice critical self-reflection, a special kind of self-awareness that focuses on evaluating and improving your communication. To engage in critical self-reflection, consider these five questions:

The goal of critical self-reflection is to enhance your communication. By routinely practicing critical self-reflection, you will achieve a deeper understanding of the factors that influence your communication choices, allowing you to make better decisions and achieve improved outcomes as a result.