A final way to enhance your intercultural competence is to adjust your communication to mesh with the behaviors of people from other cultures. According to communication accommodation theory, people are especially motivated to adapt their communication when they seek social approval, when they wish to establish relationships with others, and when they view others’ language usage as appropriate (Giles, Coupland, & Coupland, 1991). In contrast, people tend to accentuate differences between their communication and others’ when they wish to convey emotional distance and disassociate themselves from others. Research suggests that people who use communication accommodation are perceived as more competent (Coupland, Giles, & Wiemann, 1991; Giles et al., 1991).

How does this work in practice? Try adapting to other people’s communication preferences (Bianconi, 2002). During interactions, notice how long a turn people take when speaking, how quickly they speak, how direct they are, and how much they appear to want to talk compared to you. You may also need to learn and practice cultural norms for nonverbal behaviors—including eye contact, head touching, and handshaking—such as those Sue taught Walt in Gran Torino.

You can even do this during public presentations. For example, find out about your listeners’ preferences during your audience analysis, and try to adapt your communication accordingly while developing your speech. So if you’ll be speaking to an audience whose first language is not English, avoid slang; your listeners may not understand it. At the same time, avoid imitating other people’s dialects, accents, or word choices. Most people consider such imitation inappropriate and insulting.

To help you boost your own intercultural communication competence, consider the five suggestions in Table 4.1, which pulls together what we’ve discussed in this chapter.