Conflict Involves Clashes in Goals or Behaviors

At the heart of conflicts are clashes in goals or behaviors (Zacchilli, Hendrick, & Hendrick, 2009). Some conflicts revolve around incompatible goals, ranging from everyday leisure activity disputes (“I want to go out dancing!” vs. “I want to stay home!”) to serious arguments regarding personal values (“I want our children to be raised Jewish!” vs. “I want them to be Catholic!”). Other disputes break out when one person’s actions clash with another’s, for example, when a friend texts you repeatedly while you’re studying and you fire back a nasty message.