Emphasizing main ideas with subordination

Contents:

Determining what to subordinate

Avoiding excessive subordination

Using subordination for special effect

Subordination allows you to distinguish major points from minor points or to bring supporting details into a sentence. If, for instance, you put your main idea in an independent clause, you might then put any less significant ideas in dependent clauses, phrases, or even single words. The following sentence highlights the subordinated point:

Mrs. Viola Cullinan was a plump woman who lived in a three-bedroom house somewhere behind the post office.

—MAYA ANGELOU, “My Name Is Margaret”

The dependent clause adds important information about Mrs. Cullinan, but it is subordinate to the independent clause.

Notice that the choice of what to subordinate rests with the writer and depends on the intended meaning. Angelou might have given the same basic information differently:

Mrs. Viola Cullinan, a plump woman, lived in a three-bedroom house somewhere behind the post office.

Subordinating the information about Mrs. Cullinan’s size to that about her house would suggest a slightly different meaning, of course. As a writer, you must think carefully about what you want to emphasize and must subordinate information accordingly.

Subordination also establishes logical relationships among different ideas. These relationships are often specified by subordinating conjunctions.

SOME COMMON SUBORDINATING CONJUNCTIONS

after if though
although in order that unless
as once until
as if since when
because so that where
before than while
even though that

The following sentence highlights the subordinate clause and italicizes the subordinating word:

She usually rested her smile until late afternoon when her women friends dropped in and Miss Glory, the cook, served them cold drinks on the closed-in porch.

—MAYA ANGELOU, “My Name Is Margaret”

Using too many coordinate structures can be monotonous and can make it hard for readers to recognize the most important ideas. Subordinating lesser ideas can help highlight the main ideas.

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Determining what to subordinate

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The editing puts the more important information—that the new boss has saved part of the company—in an independent clause and subordinates the rest.

Avoiding excessive subordination

When too many subordinate clauses are strung together, readers may have trouble keeping track of the main idea expressed in the independent clause.

TOO MUCH SUBORDINATION

Philip II sent the Spanish Armada to conquer England, which was ruled by Elizabeth, who had executed Mary because she was plotting to overthrow Elizabeth, who was a Protestant, whereas Mary and Philip were Roman Catholics.

REVISED

Philip II sent the Spanish Armada to conquer England, which was ruled by Elizabeth, a Protestant. She had executed Mary, a Roman Catholic like Philip, because Mary was plotting to overthrow her.

Putting the facts about Elizabeth executing Mary into an independent clause makes key information easier to recognize.

You can employ a variety of grammatical structures—not merely dependent clauses—to subordinate a less important element within a sentence:

The parks report was persuasively written. It contained five typed pages. [no subordination]

The parks report, which contained five typed pages, was persuasively written. [dependent clause]

The parks report, containing five typed pages, was persuasively written. [participial phrase]

The five-page parks report was persuasively written. [adjective]

The parks report, five typed pages, was persuasively written. [appositive]

The parks report, its five pages neatly typed, was persuasively written. [absolute]

Using subordination for special effect

Some particularly fine examples of subordination come from Martin Luther King Jr. In the following passage, he piles up dependent clauses beginning with when to build up suspense for his main statement, given in the independent clause at the end:

Perhaps it is easy for those who have never felt the stinging darts of segregation to say, “Wait.” But when you have seen vicious mobs lynch your mothers and fathers at will and drown your sisters and brothers at whim; when you have seen hate-filled policemen curse, kick, and even kill your black brothers and sisters; . . .when you have to concoct an answer for a five-year-old son who is asking: “Daddy, why do white people treat colored people so mean?”; when you take a cross-country drive and find it necessary to sleep night after night in the uncomfortable corners of your automobile because no motel will accept you; . . . when your first name becomes “nigger,” your middle name becomes “boy” (however old you are) and your last name becomes “John,” and your wife and mother are never given the respected title “Mrs.”; . . .when you are forever fighting a degenerating sense of “nobodiness”—then you will understand why we find it difficult to wait.

—MARTIN LUTHER KING JR., “Letter from Birmingham Jail”

A dependent clause can also create an ironic effect if it somehow undercuts the independent clause. A master of this technique, Mark Twain once opened a paragraph with this sentence:

Always obey your parents, when they are present.

—MARK TWAIN, “Advice to Youth”