Document 13-5: Widows Loyal unto Death (ca. 1754)

Widowhood and Female Virtue in Medieval China

The ordained and practical roles of women in medieval China present several contradictions. Surviving records suggest that women were active members of society — serving as midwives, living as Buddhist nuns, and helping their families run businesses — yet several popular practices constrained the lives of women, such as the right of husbands to take concubines and the custom of binding the feet of elite women. One of the more destructive traditions, described in the stories below, was the idea that a widow should give up her life after the death of her husband in order to demonstrate her personal virtue.

Xu Sungjie, daughter of Xu Yuanyan, married Chen Boshan at the age of seventeen. When her husband was gravely ill, he told her to remarry because she had no son. At his death, she embraced him and cried bitterly. After the coffin was closed, she hanged herself to die with her husband. The official Bai Bi was impressed with her fidelity and so arranged for her burial and had a banner with the inscription “filial piety and propriety” displayed at her door.

Lin Shunde, the daughter of the prefect Lin Jin, was engaged to Sun Mengbi. When Mengbi died, she was with her father at his post. Once the announcement of her fiance’s death reached her, she put on mourning dress and wept to tell her parents that she wished to go to his home. Her parents packed for her and told her to behave properly. On arriving there, she performed the rituals for her first meeting with her parents-in-law, then she made an offering at her fiance’s coffin. After he was buried, she served her mother-in-law for the rest of her life. The local official inscribed a placard with “She hurried to the funeral of a husband she had never seen. Suffering cold and frost, she swore not to remarry.” . . .

Fu Xiajie was the wife of Chen Banghuai. Her husband was taken hostage by some bandits. She supported herself by making hemp cloth. After a long time someone told her that her husband had died. She was spinning at the time. She then immediately entered her bedroom and hanged herself.

Wu Jinshun was the wife of Sun Zhen. On the first anniversary of her husband’s death, she was so forlorn that she died of grief.

Zhang Zhongyu was engaged to Chen Shunwei, who died prematurely when Zhongyu was eighteen. When she learned of his death, she decided to hurry to the Chen family. Her parents tried to stop her, but she cried and said, “Once you betrothed me to the Chen family, I became a daughter-in-law of the Chen family.” So, she hurried to attend her fiance’s funeral and bow to her mother-in-law. Then, she cut her hair and removed her ornaments. She lived a secluded life. In the first month of the xinsi year [1461], there was a fire in her neighborhood. She leaned herself against her husband’s coffin, wanting to be burned up with her husband. Suddenly a wind came and extinguished the fire. Only her house survived. On the sixth day of the sixth month of the wuzi year [1468], a large army approached. People in the county fled helter-skelter. Zhongyu remained to guard the coffin, keeping a knife with her. When the army arrived the next day, she showed the banner and the tablet from the previous official. The soldiers recognized her righteousness, and general Bai attached his order on the door so that no other soldiers would enter her house. One day she became severely ill and told her mother-in-law, “Don’t let any men put their hands on me when I am shrouded after I die. Use the money in the small box that I earned by splicing and spinning to bury me with my husband.” Then she died.

Sun Yinxiao was the daughter of Sun Keren and married Lin Zengqing at the age of seventeen. Lin, who made his living fishing, drowned after they had been married for only two months. Sun was determined to kill herself. After the mourning period was over, she made a sacrifice with utmost grief. That night, she dressed carefully and bound a wide girdle round the beam to hang herself. When the magistrate Xu Jiadi heard of this, he paid a visit to offer a sacrifice to her soul.

Wang Yingjie was the wife of Qiu Bianyu. She was widowed at nineteen before bearing any children. As a consequence she decided to die. Her family had long been rich and her dowry was particularly ample. She gave it all to her husband’s younger brother so that in the future he could arrange for an heir to succeed to her husband. Then she ceased eating. Her mother forced her to stop, so she had no alternative but to pretend to eat and drink as usual. When her mother relaxed her vigilance, she hanged herself.

Wang Jingjie, whose family had moved to Nantai, married Fu Yan, a candidate for the examinations. Yan studied so hard that he got ill and died. When Wang learned of this, she emptied out her savings and gave it to her father-in-law to pay for her husband’s funeral, asking him to do it properly. The evening after he was buried, her brother came to console her and she asked how her parents were doing. Her brother slept in another room. At dawn, when the members of the family got up, they kept shouting to her, but she did not answer. When they pried open her door, she was already dead, having hanged herself. She was solemnly facing the inside, standing up straight. She was twenty-one.

Zhang Xiujie married He Liangpeng when she was eighteen. Before a year had passed, he became critically ill. He asked her what she would do, and she pointed to Heaven and swore to follow her husband in death. Since she wished to commit suicide, the other family members had to prevent her. After several months, their only son died of measles. Zhang wept and said, “It is my fate. I had been living for him.” That night she hanged herself.

Huang Yijie was engaged to Chen Rujing from Changle who lived in Lianjiang. Before they were married, he died. When she was fifteen, she heard of it and was saddened by it. As she slowly understood what it meant, streams of tears rolled down her cheeks. Without her knowledge a matchmaker arranged a new engagement. In the fifth month of the bingyin year [1506], her first fiance’s mother came to call. Huang followed the courtesies appropriate to a daughter-in-law when she went out to meet her, and they both expressed their grief, not holding back. After a while she asked her mother-in-law why she had come, and she told her that she had heard of the new engagement and so had come to get the brideprice back. The girl was startled and thought, “Could this be true? Only in extremely unfortunate circumstances is a dead man’s wife sold.” She told her mother-in-law, “Fortunately not much has been done with it. Let me make a plan.” Disoriented, for a long time she sat, not saying a word. Then she asked her mother-in-law to stay for the night and told her everything she wanted to say. She gave her the hairpins and earrings she had received as betrothal gifts, saying, “Keep these to remember your son by.” At dusk, her mother-in-law took her leave, and the girl, weeping, saw her to the gate. She then took a bath, combed her hair, and changed into new clothes. Those things done, she took a knife and cut her throat. The first cut did not sever it, so she had to cut it again before she died. In the morning when her family found her body, there were traces of three cuts.

READING AND DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

  1. How did a widow demonstrate her virtue and integrity after the death of her husband? To whom was she obligated after the death of her husband?
  2. How did accounts like these perpetuate the practice of widows committing suicide?