The third component involves showing the person that you understand and remember the information given—the behavioral component of listening. As a student, you know it’s important to recall information from class during an exam, and it continues to count in real-life situations. Remembering, or recalling information, contributes to perceptions of competence in interactions far beyond the classroom (Muntigl & Choi, 2010). If you don’t recall what happened in your conversation with Brett, he might be annoyed later when he tells you about how his dilemma turned out and you stare vacantly at him. Both your words and your nonverbal behaviors should communicate that you remember.

Responding involves generating feedback or reactions that let others know you’ve received and understood their message. So when Brett wonders if he should talk to his professor and you say, “Sounds like you think it’s the best course of action given the importance of this exam for your grade,” it lets him know that you fully comprehend his concern.

Motivated listeners choose to select, attend, understand, remember, and respond—and we call them active listeners. Passive listeners fail to make those choices; they may misinterpret messages, ignore them altogether, or need information and instructions repeated for them. Passive listeners are often regarded as less competent by the people around them. After all, you probably wouldn’t pour your heart out to someone who seems more interested in watching TV than listening to you.

The goal, then, is listening fidelity: the match of our thoughts and another person’s thoughts and intentions through communication (Beard, 2009; Fitch-Hauser, Powers, O’Brien, & Hanson, 2007; Powers & Bodie, 2003). Active listening plays an important role in achieving this goal.