Incompatible Goals

Since much communication is goal driven, conflicts are bound to arise when goals are perceived as incompatible (Canary, 2003). On Grey’s Anatomy, for example, the stable relationship between Callie and Arizona has had a number of challenges. Early on there was the perceived incompatible goal about children: Callie wanted to settle down and start a family, but Arizona was certain that she never wanted to have children. When couples differ on such serious life decisions, it can be extremely difficult to resolve conflict. But even among relational partners who are in agreement on big life decisions, other goals are likely to come into conflict. For example, couples that are committed to having a family have conflicts about the timing, number, and rearing of children.

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THOUGH CALLIE AND ARIZONA fall on different sides of the kids or no kids debate, is there a way they might negotiate their opposing goals? ABC/Photofest