1.2.4 Understanding Competence

Printed Page 21

Understanding Competence

Interpersonal communication competence means consistently communicating in ways that are appropriate (your communication follows accepted norms), effective (your communication enables you to achieve your goals), and ethical (your communication treats people fairly) (Spitzberg & Cupach, 1984; Wiemann, 1977). Acquiring knowledge of what it means to communicate competently is the first step in developing interpersonal communication competence (Spitzberg, 1997).

The second step is learning how to translate this knowledge into communication skills, repeatable goal-directed behaviors and behavioral patterns that you routinely practice in your interpersonal encounters and relationships (Spitzberg & Cupach, 2002). Both steps require motivation to improve your communication. If you do not believe your communication needs improvement, or if you believe that competence is unimportant or no more than common sense, your competence will be difficult, if not impossible, to refine. But, if you are strongly motivated to improve your interpersonal communication, you can master the knowledge and skills necessary to develop competence.

image
Figure 1.20: Labor leader César Chávez spent most of his life speaking out for America’s poorest farm laborers. Whether speaking with union volunteers or powerful politicians, Chávez’s interpersonal communication competence allowed him to translate his personal intentions into actions that changed the world.

Appropriateness The first characteristic of competent interpersonal communication is appropriateness—the degree to which your communication matches situational, relational, and cultural expectations regarding how people should communicate. In any interpersonal encounter, norms exist regarding what people should and shouldn’t say, and how they should and shouldn’t act. For example, in South Park, Chef commonly struggled when the boys asked him to talk about topics that aren’t considered appropriate for children. Part of developing your communication competence is refining your sensitivity to norms and adapting your communication accordingly. People who fail to adapt their communication to situational norms are perceived by others as incompetent communicators.

Question

We judge how appropriate our communication is through self-monitoring: the process of observing our own communication and the norms of the situation in order to make appropriate communication choices. Some individuals closely monitor their own communication to ensure they’re acting in accordance with situational expectations (Giles & Street, 1994). Known as high self-monitors, they prefer situations in which clear expectations exist regarding how they’re supposed to communicate. In contrast, low self-monitors don’t assess their own communication or the situation. They prefer encounters in which they can “act like themselves” rather than having to abide by norms (Snyder, 1974).

While communicating appropriately is a key part of competence, overemphasizing appropriateness can backfire. If you focus exclusively on appropriateness and always adapt your communication to what others want, you may end up forfeiting your freedom of communicative choice to peer pressure or fears of being perceived negatively (Burgoon, 1995). For example, think of a person who always gives in to what others want and never advocates for his or her own goals. Is this individual a competent communicator? How about the friend who always tells people only what they want to hear rather than the truth? As these examples suggest, exclusive attention to appropriateness can hurt both the communicator and those around him or her.

Self-Monitoring

Watch this clip to answer the questions below.

Question

Effectiveness The second characteristic of competent interpersonal communication is effectiveness: the ability to use communication to accomplish the three types of interpersonal goals discussed earlier (self-presentational, instrumental, and relational). There’s rarely a single communicative path for achieving all of these goals, and sometimes you must make trade-offs. For example, a critical part of maintaining satisfying close relationships is the willingness to occasionally sacrifice instrumental goals to achieve important relational goals. Suppose you badly want to see a movie tonight, but your romantic partner needs your emotional support to handle a serious family problem. Would you say, “I’m sorry you’re feeling bad—I’ll call you after I get home from the movie” (emphasizing your instrumental goals)? Or would you say, “I can see the movie some other time—tonight I’ll hang out with you” (emphasizing your relational goals)? The latter approach, which facilitates relationship health and happiness, is obviously more competent.

To truly be an ethical communicator, however, we must go beyond simply not doing harm. During every interpersonal encounter, we need to strive to treat others with respect, and communicate with them honestly, kindly, and positively (Englehardt, 2001). For additional guidelines on ethical communication, review the “Credo for Ethical Communication” below.

Ethics The final defining characteristic of competent interpersonal communication is ethics, the set of moral principles that guide our behavior toward others (Spitzberg & Cupach, 2002). At a minimum, we are ethically obligated to avoid intentionally hurting others through our communication. By this standard, communication that’s intended to erode a person’s self-esteem, that expresses intolerance or hatred, that intimidates or threatens others’ physical well-being, or that expresses violence is unethical and therefore incompetent (Parks, 1994).

Question

We all are capable of competence in contexts that demand little of us—situations where it’s easy to behave appropriately, effectively, and ethically. True competence is developed when we consistently communicate competently across all situations that we face—contexts that are uncertain, complex, and unpleasant, as well as those that are simple, comfortable, and pleasant. One of the goals of this book is to arm you with the knowledge and skills you need to meet challenges to your competence with confidence.

Credo of the National Communication Association

The National Communication Association (NCA) is the largest professional organization representing communication instructors, researchers, practitioners, and students in the United States. In 1999, the NCA Legislative Council adopted this “Credo for Ethical Communication” (National Communication Association, 1999).

  • image We advocate truthfulness, accuracy, honesty, and reason as essential to the integrity of communication.
  • image We endorse freedom of expression, diversity of perspective, and tolerance of dissent to achieve informed and responsible decision making.
  • image We strive to understand and respect other communicators before evaluating and responding to their messages.
  • image We promote communication climates of caring and mutual understanding that respect the unique needs and characteristics of individual communicators.
  • image We condemn communication that degrades people through distortion, intimidation, coercion, and violence, or expression of intolerance and hatred.
  • image We are committed to the courageous expression of personal convictions in pursuit of fairness and justice.
  • image We advocate sharing information, opinions, and feelings when facing significant choices while also respecting privacy and confidentiality.
  • image We accept responsibility for the short- and long-term consequences for our own communication and expect the same of others.