5.2 THE FIVE FUNCTIONS OF LISTENING

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THE FIVE FUNCTIONS OF LISTENING

Adapting our listening purposes

When style gurus Stacy London and Clinton Kelly give a makeover to a hapless fashion victim on their hit TLC show, What Not to Wear, they don’t just dole out advice. Instead, they spend a lot of time listening. Upon first meeting a new participant, they listen carefully to her story, so they can better comprehend where she is coming from. When they think someone is lying to them, or hiding important fears or feelings, they listen carefully to her tone of voice and wording, trying to discern her inner states. When a participant argumentatively defends fashion faux pas, Stacy and Clinton listen analytically, looking for ways to attack her reasoning and move her in a different direction. When a guest joyously describes her experience, they listen appreciatively—sharing in her happiness. Finally, given the emotional intensity of deconstructing one’s appearance, Stacy and Clinton often listen supportively when a participant breaks down and cries.

The different reasons for listening displayed on What Not to Wear mirror the listening functions, or purposes for listening, we experience daily. Akin to Stacy and Clinton, our interpersonal encounters are characterized by five common listening functions: to comprehend, to discern, to analyze, to appreciate, and to support.

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Figure 5.6: Fashion gurus Stacy London and Clinton Kelly use a variety of listening styles on their show What Not to Wear. While it may seem like they listen only to analyze, one of their strengths is their ability to adjust their listening styles depending on the situation.