The Journey Ahead
Interpersonal communication is our primary vehicle for exchanging meaning, connecting emotionally, and building relationships with others. This makes it essential that we base our interpersonal decisions on the best knowledge to which we have access. No one would consider making choices about collegiate majors, future careers, or monetary interests without first gathering the most trustworthy information available. Interpersonal communication should be no different.
This chapter—which introduces key definitions and important principles—will start you on your journey into the study of interpersonal communication. As we travel together through interpersonal essentials, skills, and relationships, the transformative potential of your interpersonal communication will become apparent.
focus on CULTURE: Intercultural Competence
Intercultural Competence
When GM first began marketing the Chevy Nova in South America, it sold few cars. Why? Because no va means “it won’t go” in Spanish. When Coke first began selling in China, its attempt to render Coca-Cola in Mandarin (Ke-kou-ke-la) translated as “bite the wax tadpole!”
Intercultural communication challenges aren’t limited to language. The “hook ’em horns” gesture (index and pinky finger raised) used by Texas football fans means “your wife is cheating on you” in Italy. And simply pointing at someone with your index finger is considered rude in China, Japan, Indonesia, and Latin America.
Throughout this text, we discuss cultural differences in communication and how you can best adapt to them. Such skills are essential, given that hundreds of thousands of college students choose to pursue their studies overseas, international travel is increasingly common, and technology continues to connect people worldwide. As a starting point for building your intercultural competence, consider these suggestions:
Think globally. If the world’s population was reduced in scale to 1,000 people, only 56 would be from Canada, Mexico, and the United States.
Learn appropriateness. Take the time to learn the practices of other cultures before interacting with their people.
Be respectfully inquisitive. When you’re unsure about how to communicate, politely ask. People will view you as competent—even if you make mistakes—when you sincerely try to learn and abide by their cultural expectations.
Use simple language. Avoid slang and jargon. A phrase like “Let’s cut to the chase” may make sense if you’re originally from Canada or the United States, but it won’t necessarily be understood elsewhere.
Be patient with yourself and others. Becoming interculturally competent is a lifelong journey, not a short-term achievement.
discussion questions
How has your cultural background shaped how you communicate with people from other cultures?
What’s the biggest barrier that keeps people of different cultures from communicating competently with each other?
POSTSCRIPT
We began this chapter with a military wife struggling to juggle the competing demands of raising her children and maintaining her marriage. Melissa Seligman uses multiple media to stay connected with her husband during his combat deployments. At the same time, she has learned that computers, phones, and care packages are merely tools. The most important thing is open, honest, and loving communication.
How do you stay close with loved ones who are distant? What tough communication choices have you faced in these relationships?
The story of Melissa Seligman’s struggle reminds us of an inescapable truth that forms the foundation for this book. Our close relationships are the most important things in our lives, and it’s our choices regarding how we communicate that determine whether these relationships survive and thrive, or fade away.