Chapter 10, Additional Exercise 4: Tracing the Effects of Active and Passive Voice
Reproduced below are two versions of the body of a memo from the president of a university, directed to all faculty and staff. The first memo is written entirely in the active voice. The second is in the passive voice. Analyze the two memos, focusing on how the memo is changed by writing each sentence in the passive voice or in the active voice. You might begin by thinking about how tone, persuasiveness, and diplomacy are affected by changing passive-voice sentences to active-voice sentences. You might also want to think about which sentences in the two memos are most effective in the active voice and which are most effective in the passive voice. Present your findings in a 500-word memo to your instructor. (See Chapter 14 for a discussion of memos.)
Active Voice
Monday afternoon the Ada County Prosecutor informed us that the Prosecutor's Office has charged Tim Jewkes, a former State U employee, with grand theft. The Prosecutor's Office alleges that Mr. Jewkes misappropriated funds from accounts in the Department of Health, Physical Education, and Recreation (HPER).
State U hired Tim Jewkes in August 2010 as office coordinator. HPER sponsors a variety of activities—workshops, summer camps, facility rentals—and participants in these activities make payments directly to HPER. The office coordinator manages these funds. It now appears that Tim Jewkes may have misappropriated a portion of these funds. Because State U has turned over all records to investigators, we cannot determine the exact amount involved; however, we estimate that Tim Jewkes or some other person has misappropriated more than $20,000.
Three months ago, State U auditors discovered discrepancies in accounting in the cashier's office; State U's internal auditing staff immediately investigated these discrepancies, beginning July 28, 2015. State U turned the case over to the Idaho Attorney General's Office the second week of September. Tim Jewkes submitted a letter of resignation on October 6.
As is the case at a bank or any other business, employees at a university can sometimes misappropriate funds. In those rare instances when we suspect misappropriation, we thoroughly investigate the matter and prosecute the individual if the situation warrants prosecution.
We are evaluating our cash-and-check receipting procedures to determine if we can make refinements to those procedures. We anticipate that we will implement changes in these procedures, but we do not know the extent of those changes. At any rate, we will subject the procedures to a thorough review.
At this time, I can make available no other information about this matter. As a general policy, State U releases information about such matters only after law-enforcement agencies have completed an investigation. Of course, a lack of information can sometimes cause a lack of understanding, but I hope that this memo clarifies some of the confusion that this case caused.
Passive Voice
Monday afternoon we were informed by the Ada County Prosecutor that a former State U employee, Tim Jewkes, had been charged with grand theft. It is alleged that funds were misappropriated from accounts in the Department of Health, Physical Education, and Recreation (HPER).
Tim Jewkes was hired by State U in August 2010 as office coordinator. A variety of activities—workshops, summer camps, facility rentals—are sponsored by HPER, and payments for these activities are made directly to HPER. These funds are managed by the office coordinator. It now appears that a portion of these funds may have been misappropriated. Because all records have been turned over to investigators, the exact amount involved cannot be determined; however, it is estimated that more than $20,000 has been misappropriated.
Three months ago, discrepancies in accounting were discovered in the cashier's office and were immediately investigated by State U's internal auditing staff, beginning July 28, 2015. The case was turned over to the Idaho Attorney General's Office the second week of September. A letter of resignation was submitted by Tim Jewkes on October 6.
As is the case at a bank or any other business, funds can sometimes be misappropriated by employees working at a university. In those rare instances when misappropriation is suspected, a thorough investigation is conducted and prosecution is accomplished if prosecution is warranted by the situation.
An evaluation of our cash-and-check receipting procedures is now being undertaken to determine if refinements can be made. It is anticipated that changes in these procedures will be implemented, but the extent of those changes is unknown. At any rate, the procedures will be subjected to a thorough review.
At this time, no other information about this matter can be made available. As a general policy, information about such matters is released only after an investigation has been completed by law-enforcement agencies. Of course, a lack of understanding can sometimes be caused by a lack of information, but it is hoped that some of the confusion caused by this case is clarified by this memo.