Improving the Draft: Revising, Editing, and Proofreading

Start improving your draft by reflecting on what you have written thus far:

Revise your draft.

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If your readers are having difficulty with your draft, or if you think there is room for improvement, try some of the strategies listed in the Troubleshooting Guide that follows. It can help you fine-tune your presentation of the genre’s basic features.

A TROUBLESHOOTING GUIDE

Click the Troubleshooting Guide to download.

A Focused, Well-Presented Issue My readers don’t get the point.

  • Quote experts or add information—statistics, examples, anecdotes, and so on—to help readers understand what’s at stake.

  • Consider adding visuals, such as photos, graphs, tables, or charts to present the issue more clearly.

My readers have a different perspective on the issue than I do.

  • Show the limitations of how the issue has traditionally been understood.

  • Reframe the issue by showing how it relates to values, concerns, needs, and priorities you share with readers.

  • Give concrete examples or anecdotes, facts, and details that could help readers see the issue as you see it.
A Well-Supported Position My readers do not find my argument clear and/or persuasive.

  • Revisit your thesis statement to make sure your position is stated clearly and directly.

  • Reconsider your reasons, or explain how they support your position.

  • Add supporting evidence—statistics, examples, authorities, and so on.

  • Consider adding visuals, graphs, tables, or charts to support your argument.

  • Strengthen the logical, ethical, and/or emotional appeals of your argument.

  • Try outlining your argument; if your organization is weak or illogical, or if your transitional strategies are not working, try reorganizing the material, adding transitional words and phrases, or repeating key words strategically.
An Effective Response to Opposing Views My readers question my response to opposing arguments or objections to my argument.

  • If your refutation is weak, strengthen it with additional or more compelling reasons and evidence.

  • If your concession weakens your argument, qualify your position with words like sometimes or often.

  • Consider adding a refutation to your concession.

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A Clear, Logical Organization My readers are confused by my essay or find it difficult to follow.

  • Outline your essay. If necessary, move, add, or delete sections to strengthen coherence.

  • Consider adding a forecasting statement with key terms that are repeated in topic sentences throughout the essay.

  • Check for appropriate transitions between sentences, paragraphs, and major sections of your essay.

  • Review your opening and closing paragraphs. Be sure that your thesis is clearly expressed and that you reaffirm your position in your closing.

Edit and proofread your draft.

Students frequently struggle to maintain a neutral tone when arguing a position they hold dearly. Our research also indicates that incorrect comma usage in sentences with coordinating conjunctions and punctuation errors in sentences that use conjunctive adverbs are common in position arguments. The following guidelines will help you check your essay for these common errors.

Editing for Tone

To demonstrate that you are treating alternative viewpoints fairly, use words with a positive or neutral connotation (emotional resonance) and avoid name-calling.

As you edit your position argument, also watch out for language that is puffed up or pompous:

Using Commas before Coordinating Conjunctions

In essays that argue a position, writers often use coordinating conjunctions (and, but, for, or, nor, so, and yet) to join related independent clauses— groups of words that can stand alone as complete sentences — to create compound sentences. Consider this example from Jessica Statsky’s essay:

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In this sentence, Statsky links two complete ideas of equal importance with the coordinating conjunction but to emphasize contrast.

The Problem Two common errors occur in sentences like these:

  1. A comma may be left out when two independent clauses are linked by a coordinating conjunction.

  2. A comma may be inserted before the coordinating conjunction when one of the sentence parts is not an independent clause.

The Correction Add a comma before coordinating conjunctions that join two independent clauses, as in the following example:

A Note on Grammar and Spelling Checkers

These tools can be helpful, but do not rely on them exclusively to catch errors in your text: Spelling checkers cannot catch misspellings that are themselves words, such as to for too. Grammar checkers miss some problems, sometimes give faulty advice for fixing problems, and can flag correct items as wrong. Use these tools as a second line of defense after your own (and, ideally, another reader’s) editing and proofreading efforts.

Omit the comma when coordinating conjunctions join phrases that are not independent clauses:

Avoiding Comma Splices When Using Conjunctive Adverbs to Link Independent Clauses

Conjunctive adverbs (such as consequently, furthermore, however, moreover, therefore, and thus) indicate the logical relationships among ideas. For example, words like thus and therefore are used to alert readers that a conclusion is coming, and words like furthermore and moreover are used to alert readers to expect additional ideas on the same topic. When writers take a position, they often use conjunctive adverbs to link independent clauses.

Consider this example:

In this sentence, the writer uses the word thus to indicate that he is drawing a conclusion.

The Problem A comma splice is one error that often occurs when writers use a comma before a conjunctive adverb linking two independent clauses.
The Correction Use a semicolon before and a comma after a conjunctive adverb when it links two independent clauses:

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Make sure that both parts of the sentence are independent clauses before inserting a semicolon, a conjunctive adverb, and a comma to link them. If one or both parts cannot stand alone, add a subject, a verb, or both as needed to avoid a sentence fragment:

Alternatively, you may replace the semicolon, conjunctive adverb, and comma with a coordinating conjunction:

A Common Problem for Multilingual Writers: Subtle Differences in Meaning

Because the distinctions in meaning among some common conjunctive adverbs are subtle, nonnative speakers often have difficulty using them accurately. For example, the difference between however and nevertheless is small; each is used to introduce a contrasting statement. But nevertheless emphasizes the contrast, whereas however softens it. Check usage of such terms in an English dictionary rather than a bilingual one. The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language has special usage notes to help distinguish frequently confused words.