Full Special Occasion/Hero Speech "My Hero, Marilyn" by Lillian Gentz

Audience Analysis

Lillian's topic is well chosen for her college audience who may take risks and not always foresee tragic results. Her hero is an active, daring woman who would inspire both the young men and women in her audience. Marilyn is a person who has overcome a devastating accident, built a business, and continued her active sports life. Her story is universally motivating.

Content and Supporting Ideas

Lillian develops three main points: her description of Marilyn's accident, Marilyn's success as a businesswoman, and accomplishments as an athlete in spite of her paralysis.

Lillian uses emotionally charged words like "plunges," and "desperately clings," to reinforce pathos in her first main point.

Light humor brightens the second main point when she remarks that color was the most important thing lacking in conventional wheelchairs. "Hot purple…with gold rims" is surprising and vivid.

In the third main point Lillian enumerates Marilyn's impressive athletic accomplishments in detail and skillfully surprises her audience by revealing last that "up until a few years ago, Marilyn was still hang gliding."

Introduction/Transitions/Conclusion

Lillian's opening accomplishes two things: she immediately connects to her audience with two attention getting rhetorical questions and she builds suspense. The opening narrative about the accident is described succinctly but in vivid detail designed to arouse emotion. Lillian follows this with another series of rhetorical questions that lead expertly to her preview of the three main points.

The transitions used throughout the speech are straightforward and serviceable. They lead listeners clearly from point to point. Lillian's opening description suggests that she is capable of better writing. Rather than announcing "today I will share with you, "I'm going to begin by telling you," and "now that I've told you" she could craft more subtle and fluid transitions.

Lillian closes with a one sentence, clean summary of her three main points and a well timed quotation. The quotation is particularly effective as it is Marilyn's own words and Lillian uses them to end with the same rhetorical question she began with, but it now serves very nicely as an inspirational challenge.

Delivery

Lillian's vocally expressive, well paced, and articulates expertly over some difficult phrases because she deliberately slows her pace. She uses pauses for emphasis and punctuates words like "as she plunges" and "does she quit? No."

Unless she is moving her visual aids Lillian keeps her hands clasped in front of her. She looks confident and professional. A few gestures would add a sense of spontaneity to her physical delivery. She is facially expressive and has a wonderful, appreciative smile on the phrase "being the strong-willed person that she is." She clearly shows in her face and voice genuine admiration for Marilyn.

Visual Aids

Lillian displays a series of five photographs mounted on black poster board as they pertain to segments of her speech. When not relevant to her topic she moves them smoothly out of sight. The photographs help Lillian clarify portions of her speech quickly and simply. For instance, when she refers to a ski bob, we see a photograph of that equipment and understand it instantly. Photographs of Marilyn hang gliding, playing tennis, and smiling in her wheelchair dramatically reinforce Marilyn's athleticism and make her real for listeners.

The photographs are not all clear copies and when a black and white photograph immediately follows a stunning description of a "hot purple Quickie with gold rims" the lack of color disappoints. The size of the posters may be adequate for a small audience. Positioning her visuals in front of herself not only makes it easy for Lillian to manipulate them but it keeps attention in her direction. Without photographs of Marilyn, the speech would be less powerful.