Peer review with Emily Lesk’s draft

First-year composition student Emily Lesk wrote a draft, “All-Powerful Coke,” in response to this assignment:

Explore the ways in which one or more media (television, print advertising, and so on) have affected an aspect of American identity, and discuss the implications of your findings for you and your readers.

As you read her draft, think about the strengths and weaknesses you identify in the draft, and consider how you would advise her to revise her work. You will have an opportunity to offer compliments and suggestions in the prompts below.

Reflect on the draft’s strengths and weaknesses

To practice writing an objective response to another writer’s work, respond to the following prompts. Click Submit after each prompt to record your response.

Copy and paste into the following boxes the two paragraphs or sections of the draft that seem strongest to you.
Copy and paste into the following boxes the two paragraphs or sections of the draft that seem strongest to you. (First paragraph/section.)

Copy and paste into the following boxes the two paragraphs or sections of the draft that seem strongest to you. (Second paragraph/section.)

What would you tell the writer of this draft, Emily Lesk, that you liked most about these sections? Why?

What one thing would you suggest that Emily Lesk change to improve the draft before submitting it? Why do you recommend this change?