When readers point out that your thesis is unclear, the comment often signals that they have a hard time identifying your essay’s main point.
Strategies for revising
Ask questions. What is the thesis, position, or main point of the draft? Can you support it with the available evidence?
Reread your entire draft. Because ideas develop as you write, you may find that your conclusion contains a clearer statement of your main point than your working thesis does. Or you may find your thesis elsewhere in your draft.
Try framing your thesis as an answer to a question you pose, the resolution of a problem you identify, or a position you take in a debate. And put your thesis to the “So what?” test: Why would a reader be interested in this thesis?