Repeating function words to clarify parallels

Function words such as prepositions and subordinating conjunctions signal the grammatical nature of the word groups to follow. Although they can sometimes be omitted, include them whenever they signal parallel structures that might otherwise be missed by readers.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: Many hooked smokers try switching to a brand they find distasteful or a low tar and nicotine cigarette. Revised sentence: Many hooked smokers try switching to a brand they find distasteful or to a low tar and nicotine cigarette. Explanation: The word

In the original sentence, the prepositional phrase was too complex for easy reading. The repetition of the preposition to prevents readers from losing their way.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: The ophthalmologist told me that Julie was extremely farsighted but corrective lenses would help considerably. Revised sentence: The ophthalmologist told me that Julie was extremely farsighted but that corrective lenses would help considerably. Explanation: The word

A second subordinating conjunction helps readers sort out the two parallel ideas: that Julie was extremely farsighted and that corrective lenses would help.

If it is possible to streamline the sentence, repetition of the function word may not be necessary.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: The board reported that its investments had done well in the first quarter but they they had since dropped in value. Revised sentence: The board reported that its investments had done well in the first quarter but had since dropped in value. Explanation: The words

Instead of linking two subordinate clauses beginning with that, the revision streamlines the sentence by balancing the two parts of a compound predicate—had done well in the first quarter and had since dropped in value.

Exercises:

Identifying parallel structure

Parallelism 1

Parallelism 2

Parallelism 3

Parallelism 4