Making comparisons logical

Comparisons should be made between items that are alike. To compare unlike items is illogical and distracting.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: The forests of North American are much more extensive than Europe. Revised sentence: The forests of North American are much more extensive than those of Europe. Explanation: The words

Forests must be compared with forests.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: The graduation rate of our student athletes is higher than the rest of the student population. Revised sentence: Our student athletes graduate at a higher rate than the rest of the student population.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: The graduate rate of our student athletes is higher than the rest of the student population. Revised sentence: The graduate rate of our student athletes is higher than that of the rest of the student population.

A rate cannot be logically compared with a population. Both revisions provide the words needed for the comparison; the first revision is more concise.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: Some that that Ella Fitzgerald's renditions of Cole Porter's songs are better than any other singer. Revised sentence: Some that that Ella Fitzgerald's renditions of Cole Porter's songs are better than any other singer's. Explanation: The word

Ella Fitzgerald’s renditions cannot be logically compared with a singer. The revision uses the possessive form singer’s, with the word renditions being implied: . . . Fitzgerald’s renditions . . . are better than any other singer’s renditions.

Sometimes the word other must be inserted to make a comparison logical.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: Jupiter is larger than any planet in our solar system. Revised sentence: Jupiter is larger than any other planet in our solar system. Explanation: The word

Jupiter cannot be larger than itself.

Sometimes the word as must be inserted to make a comparison grammatically correct.

Example sentence with editing. Original sentence: The city of Lowell is as old, if not older than, the city of Lawrence. Revised sentence: The city of Lowell is as old as, if not older than, the city of Lawrence. Explanation: The word

The construction as old is not complete without a second as: as old as . . . the city of Lawrence.

Exercises:

Needed words 1

Needed words 2

Needed words 3

Needed words 4