20d. Revision by restructuring

20dConsider restructuring the sentence, perhaps by subordinating one of the clauses.

If one of the independent clauses is less important than the other, turn the less important clause into a subordinate clause or phrase. (For more about subordination, see 14a, especially the chart "Using subordination to combine sentences of unequal importance" at the bottom of that page.)

image

image

image

Minor ideas in these sentences are now expressed in subordinate clauses or phrases.