| Nearly two-thirds of college students (61.2%) use mediated channels to engage in conflicts, most commonly via text messaging (Frisby & Westerman, 2010). While managing conflicts offline reduces attributional errors and boosts empathy, that isn’t always possible or desirable. When you must deal with a conflict online, try these suggestions (Munro, 2002): |
 WAIT AND REREAD. When you receive a message that provokes you, don’t respond right away. Instead, take a break and then reread it. This gives you a chance to reassess it and reply when you are calmer. |
ASSUME THE BEST AND WATCH OUT FOR THE WORST. Presume that the sender meant well but didn’t express him- or herself competently. Remember all the challenges of online communication, such as online disinhibition and empathy deficits. At the same time, realize that some people enjoy conflict. Firing back a nasty message may be what the person wants.  |
 SEEK OUTSIDE COUNSEL. Before responding, discuss the situation (ideally, face-to-face) with someone whose opinion you trust. Having an additional viewpoint will enhance your ability to perspective-take and will help you make a wise communication choice. |
WEIGH YOUR OPTIONS CAREFULLY. Choose cautiously between engaging or avoiding the confict. Consider the consequences associated with each option, and which is most likely to net you the long-term outcomes you desire.  |
 COMMUNICATE COMPETENTLY. Use “I” language, incorporate appropriate emoticons, express empathy and perspective-taking, encourage the other person to share relevant thoughts and feelings, and make clear your willingness to collaborate. Importantly, start and end your message with positive statements that support rather than attack the other person. |