Why do you communicate? The answer may seem obvious: you communicate to share your thoughts and feelings to others. Although that is true, communication also helps you meet three types of goals (Clark & Delia, 1979).

The first type is self-presentation goals, which involve presenting yourself in certain ways so that others will view you as you want them to. For example, when SXSW founder Louis Black first came up with the idea of hosting a music festival in Austin, he had to pitch the proposal to both community leaders and corporate sponsors. In each of these encounters, he had to present himself as a credible, trustworthy person who would organize the gathering responsibly—or else his proposal would never have been supported.

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The second type is instrumental goals—practical objectives you want to achieve or tasks you want to accomplish. To create SXSW, Louis Black needed community leaders and corporate sponsors to perceive him (through how he communicated) as credible and trustworthy (self-presentation goals). But he also needed to persuade them to approve the necessary permits and provide him with money for events, and so he tailored his communication toward achieving these instrumental goals. Oftentimes, you’ll find that presenting yourself in certain ways (likable, trustworthy, credible) facilitates the achievement of your practical goals.

The third type is relationship goals—building, maintaining, or terminating bonds with others. This is perhaps the coolest part of the SXSW story. Although it’s now a $300 million global media and music festival, SXSW originally began because Louis Black wanted to talk and build friendships with fellow music lovers. Like Louis, whenever we use our communication to create emotional connections with others, we are pursuing relationship goals.