Thought Informs Language

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Jamal Henderson is preparing to apply to colleges. He keeps his father, Michael, involved in the process because he values his opinion. They both agree that Jamal should attend a “good college.” But Michael feels hurt when Jamal starts talking seriously about urban universities in another state. He thinks his son has ruled out his own alma mater, the local campus of the state university system. Jamal and Michael have different thoughts about what a “good college” is. Their language and thoughts are related in their own minds, and each thinks he is using the term appropriately.

Your cognitive language is the system of symbols you use to describe people, things, and situations in your mind. It influences your language (Giles & Wiemann, 1987) and is related to your thoughts, attitudes, and co-cultures and the society in which you live (Bradac & Giles, 2005). Michael may think a “good college” is close to home, is involved in the local community, and offers small class sizes. Meanwhile, Jamal may think a “good college” presents the opportunity to live in a new city and to study with people from other countries.

Our thinking affects the language we use. But our language also influences our thoughts. If you tell yourself that a coworker is an “idiot,” the word may influence your future impressions of him. To illustrate, if he’s quiet during a meeting, you might conclude that he knows nothing about the subject under discussion. As another example, a study of women who stayed in violent romantic relationships found that they often crafted dark narratives to explain why the abuse was their fault or how it somehow expressed caring (“He’s in a great mood now—it must have been the alcohol. He really wants the best for me. I should try to please him more—not ‘push his buttons’”) (Boonzaier, 2008; Olson, 2004).