Older than Average
Are you an older student, maybe in your thirties or forties, who is back in college? As an adult, you probably have a great deal of life experience in dealing with tough times. You might have real strengths in emotional intelligence that you have developed at work, at home, or with your family, but you may also have some areas that you need to improve. How are you using your skills to stand up for yourself and negotiate with others as you face the challenges of college? Using your existing strengths and skills in college could allow you to be a role model for others. You might want to give some advice to younger students who seem to be struggling with the day-to-day interactions that are part of college life and help those students find ways to be more adaptable, resilient, and assertive.
Resilience is another important component of emotional intelligence. As you learned in Chapter 1, being resilient means that you are optimistic and tough in the face of adversity. You remain positive even when you are faced with negative circumstances. While you’re in college, you might receive an “F” on a paper, have trouble making connections with others in class, or lose a student government election. Such experiences might cause you to question whether you should be in college at all. Resilient students, though, look past negative experiences, learn from them, and try again. What can you do to improve your grade on your next paper? Perhaps you didn’t allow yourself enough time to do the proper research. How can you feel more comfortable in your classes? Maybe it would help to join a study group. Why were you passed over for the student government office that you wanted? Consider the possibility that you may need to show a greater commitment to campus governance issues. Developing coping mechanisms and life skills leads to resilience. You were born with the ability to be resilient—it’s up to you to let your resilience emerge and to embrace it.