Death was similarly marked by religious ceremonies, and among Europeans of all faiths, death did not sever family obligations and connections. Christians called for a priest to perform the sacrament of extreme unction when they thought the hour of death was near.

Once the person had died, the body was washed and dressed in special clothing — or a sack of plain cloth — and buried within a day or two. Family and friends joined in a funeral procession. The wealthy were sometimes buried inside the church — in the walls, under the floor, or under the building itself in a crypt — but most people were buried in the churchyard or a cemetery close by. At the graveside, the priest asked for God’s grace for the soul of the deceased and also asked that soul to “rest in peace.” This final request was made not only for the benefit of the dead but also for that of the living because the souls of the dead were widely believed to return to earth. Priests were hired to say memorial masses on anniversaries of family deaths, especially one week, one month, and one year afterward.

During the High Middle Ages, learned theologians increasingly emphasized the idea of purgatory, the place where souls on their way to Heaven went after death to make amends for their earthly sins. Memorial masses, prayers, and donations made in the names of the dead could shorten their time in purgatory. So could indulgences (see "Background and Motives of the Crusades" in Chapter 9), those papal grants that relieved a person from earthly penance. Indulgences were initially granted for performing meritorious acts, such as going on a pilgrimage or crusade, but later they could be obtained by paying a small fee. With this development, their spiritual benefits became transferable, so indulgences could be purchased to shorten the stay in purgatory of one’s deceased relatives, as well as to lessen one’s own penance or time in purgatory.

The living also had obligations to the dead among Muslims and Jews. In both groups, deceased people were buried quickly, and special prayers were said by mourners and family members. Muslims fasted on behalf of the dead and maintained a brief period of official mourning. The Qur’an promises an eternal paradise with flowing rivers to “those who believe and do good deeds” (Qur’an, 4:57) and a Hell of eternal torment to those who do not.

Jews observed specified periods of mourning during which the normal activities of daily life were curtailed. Every day for eleven months after a death and every year after that on the anniversary of the death, a son of the deceased was to recite Kaddish, a special prayer of praise and glorification of God. Judaism emphasized life on earth more than an afterlife, so beliefs about what happens to the soul after death were more varied; the very righteous might go directly to a place of spiritual reward, but most souls went first to a place of punishment and purification generally referred to as Gehinnom. After a period that did not exceed twelve months, the soul ascended to the world to come. Those who were completely wicked during their lifetimes might simply go out of existence or continue in an eternal state of remorse.