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Eulogies and Other Tributes

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The word eulogy derives from the Greek word meaning “to praise.” Those delivering eulogies, usually close friends or family members of the deceased, are charged with celebrating and commemorating the life of someone while consoling those who have been left behind.

Balance delivery and emotions. The audience looks to the speaker for guidance in dealing with the loss and for a sense of closure, so stay in control. If you do feel that you are about to break down, pause, take a breath, and focus on your next thought.
Refer to the family of the deceased. Families suffer the greatest loss, and a funeral is primarily for their benefit. Show respect for the family, and mention each family member by name.
Be positive but realistic. Emphasize the deceased’s positive qualities while avoiding excessive praise.

Commemorate Life—Not Death

A eulogy should pay tribute to the deceased person as an individual and remind the audience that he or she is still alive, in a sense, in our memories. Rather than focus on the circumstances of death, focus on the life of the person. Talk about the person’s contributions and achievements, and demonstrate the person’s character. Consider telling an anecdote that illustrates the type of person you are eulogizing. Even humorous anecdotes may be appropriate if they effectively humanize the deceased.