Using Language to Share Information
As indicated, sometimes competent language use means knowing when to withhold information or avoid topics. This is particularly important when developing and maintaining interpersonal relationships (Chapter 7). For example, strategic topic avoidance allows you to steer the conversation away from discussing your friend’s recent painful breakup until she is ready to discuss it.
Have you ever asked a sick child to tell you “where it hurts,” only to receive a vague and unhelpful answer? This is because young children are still developing the next functional competency, informing—using language to give and receive information. As an adult, if you’ve ever been asked for directions, you know that providing people with information that they can understand and understanding the information they’re conveying to you are equally important skills.
There are four important aspects of informing: questioning, describing, reinforcing, and withholding.
- Questioning is something we learn at a young age and use throughout our lives. Young children hungry for information about their world quickly learn the power of the simple, one-
word question “Why?” - Describing helps us communicate our world to others. Parents and teachers may ask children to repeat directions to their school or their home or to detail the specifics of a story they’ve heard.
- Reinforcing information can help us become competent listeners. We might take notes or simply repeat the information to confirm our comprehension.
- Withholding information or opinions may be appropriate in some situations. For example, you may withhold your opposition to your manager’s plan because you want to keep your job. Or you may elect not to reveal a piece of information that might embarrass a friend.
Together, these four skills form the basis of the informational competency that we use to communicate throughout our lives.
