When the University of Arizona opened the National Institute for Civil Discourse, they wanted to promote compromise and understanding among groups famously at odds with one another (Dooling, 2011). They quickly found out that it was not only the words used that stood in the way of civility, but it was also the vocal tone. Imagine yourself saying, “I respect your right to believe that” with a calm, balanced tone; now imagine saying the same words with a sarcastic tone while emphasizing the word right. You could communicate genuine respect in the first instance or disgust and intolerance in the second.

The vocalized sounds that accompany our words are nonverbal behaviors called paralanguage. Pitch in language involves variations in the voice (higher or lower) that give prominence to certain words or syllables. Vocal tone is a modulation of the voice, usually expressing a particular feeling or mood; you may notice your friend sounds “down” or hear the excitement in your teammate’s revelry about your win. Vocal volume is how loud or soft the voice is—think of the softness of a whisper or the thunder of an angry shout.

In addition to pitch, tone, and volume, paralanguage also involves behaviors like pauses, hesitations, vocal quality, accents, and the rate and rhythm of speech. It exhibits qualities like hoarseness, nasality, smoothness, or deepness, and it may sound precise, clipped, slurred, or shrill. Teenage girls are sometimes mocked for using uptalk (making statements into questions? “Right?”) or for guttural flutter of the vocal cords called “vocal fry,” as in comedienne Maya Rudolph’s mimicry of poet Maya Angelou on Saturday Night Live (Quenqua, 2012).

We all have preferences about which voices are most attractive—angry, demanding voices are usually perceived as annoying—and whiny voices really annoying (Sokol, Webster, Thompson, & Stevens, 2005). Look no further than your favorite radio DJs or newscasters to examine the vocal qualities people enjoy the most. These individuals tend to have smooth voices and find a middle ground between precise and fluid speech. Pronunciation matters too—and can identify individuals as coming from another country or region. Thus, our Missouri readers may know that residents disagree on whether to pronounce their home state as “Missouruh” (which tags a speaker as being from a rural part of the state) or “Misoureeee,” indicating a more urban environment. Interestingly, politicians often pronounce it both ways to cover their bases (Wheaton, 2012).

Meanwhile, vocalizations are paralinguistic utterances that give information about our emotional or physical state, such as laughing, crying, sighing, yawning, or moaning. Other vocalizations simply replace words or create nonword fillers in conversations. You might clear your throat to get someone’s attention or use “Shhhh” to quiet a crowd, and most of us tend to insert “umm’s” and “ah’s” into conversation when we’re taking a moment to think. Sometimes such back-channel cues signal when we want to talk versus when we’re encouraging others to continue talking (“oh,” “uh-huh”).