Triumph. Exultation. Unbridled joy. These meanings are communicated from every aspect of Brandi Chastain’s nonverbal expression. On July 10, 1999, Chastain scored the penalty kick that earned the United States the Women’s World Cup victory. As tens of millions of viewers watched, she tore her jersey off and dropped to her knees. But even as Chastain celebrated, her decision to communicate in this manner sparked controversy. Although male players routinely removed and waved their jerseys to mark victories, female players weren’t supposed to present themselves publicly in this way. As Faye Wattleton, president of the Center for Advancement of Women, notes, a substantial double standard exists: what’s acceptable nonverbally for men is often viewed with “collective horror” when women do it. In the aftermath, Chastain’s choice would ignite public consternation, influence fashion, and alter athletic rules. Photos appeared on the covers of Time, Newsweek, and Sports Illustrated. A man on the street confronted Chastain, demanding, “Why did you do that!? I can’t let my daughter walk around in a jog bra!” Some pundits suggested that the gesture was a marketing ploy: the sports bra Chastain wore displayed Nike’s trademark “swoosh.” In the fashion season following, sports-bra sales skyrocketed. And soccer officials banned the “tearing off the jersey” gesture—for women and men.

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In 2012, ESPN conducted an online poll of the “greatest moment in U.S. women’s sports.” The women’s World Cup victory was the overwhelming winner. But even though it’s been more than a decade since this iconic event, people still question Chastain about her behavior, interpreting it in ways other than what she intended. As she notes, “Everybody is going to have their opinion about it. . . . But it was just a ‘YES!’ Twenty-something years of playing the game, and this was the most perfect moment.”

Like Chastain, when we’re caught up in an emotional moment, good or bad, we think of our nonverbal expression as something that just happens, a simple and direct reflection of our inner states. But nonverbal communication serves many different functions in our lives. Within interpersonal encounters, nonverbal communication serves at least five functions: it expresses emotions, conveys meanings, presents ourselves to others, helps manage interactions, and defines relationships (Argyle, 1969).

EXPRESSING EMOTION

When Brandi Chastain described her nonverbal behavior as being “just a ‘YES!’“ she highlighted arguably the most elemental function of nonverbal communication: the expression of emotion. We communicate emotion nonverbally through affect displays—intentional or unintentional nonverbal behaviors that display actual or feigned emotions (Burgoon et al., 1996). In everyday interactions, affect displays are presented primarily through the face and voice. Intentional use of the face to communicate emotion begins during late infancy, when babies learn to facially communicate anger and happiness to get what they want (Burgoon et al., 1996). Unintentional affect displays begin even earlier. Infants in the first few weeks of life instinctively and reflexively display facial expressions of distress, disgust, and interest. As adults, we communicate hundreds, if not thousands, of real and faked emotional states with our faces.

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People also use vocalics to convey emotions. Consider how you communicate love through your voice. What changes do you make in pitch, tone, volume, and speech rate? How does your “loving” voice differ from your “angry” voice? Most people express emotions such as grief and love through lowered vocal pitch, and hostile emotions—such as anger and contempt—through loudness (Costanzo, Markel, & Costanzo, 1969). Pitch conveys emotion so powerfully that the source of the sound (human voice or other) is irrelevant, and words aren’t necessary. Researcher Klaus Scherer (1974) mimicked voice patterns on a music synthesizer and had listeners judge the emotion conveyed. Participants strongly associated high pitch with emotions such as anger, fear, and surprise, and they linked low pitch with pleasantness, boredom, and sadness.

CONVEYING MEANINGS

In the wake of her triumph, much of the debate regarding Chastain centered around what she “meant” by her behavior. Was she making a “feminist statement”? Was it a “marketing ploy”?

Just as we use words to signify unique meanings, we often use nonverbal communication to directly convey meanings. Your boss flips you a thumbs-up gesture following a presentation, and you know she means “Good job!” A friend makes a two-finger V at a campus rally, and you recognize it as an emblem for peace.

At other times we use nonverbal communication more indirectly, as a means for accenting or augmenting verbal communication meanings (Malandro & Barker, 1983). We do this in five ways, the first of which is by reiterating. Nonverbal communication is used to reiterate or repeat verbal messages, as when you say “Up!” and then point upward. Second, we contradict our verbal messages with our nonverbal communication. For example, a friend may ask if you’re angry, but you respond by scowling and angrily shouting “No, I’m not angry!” Third, we use nonverbal communication to enhance the meaning of verbal messages, such as when you tell an intimate “I love you” while smiling and offering a gentle touch to emphasize the point. Fourth, we sometimes use nonverbal communication to replace verbal expressions, such as when you shake your head instead of saying no. Finally, we use nonverbal communication to spotlight certain parts of verbal messages, such as when you increase the loudness of just one word: “STOP hitting your brother with that light saber!”

PRESENTING SELF

Think about your interactions with your manager at work. How do you let him or her know—without words—that you’re a dedicated and hardworking employee? Chances are, you employ almost all the nonverbal codes previously discussed, simultaneously. You convey attentiveness through focused eye contact and pleasant facial expression, and you communicate seriousness through moderate speech rate and pitch. You likely avoid crowding your boss and touching him or her. You also dress appropriately for the office and try to obey workplace norms regarding how you decorate your work space.

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Now imagine that your manager confides in you a recent diagnosis of terminal illness. How would you use nonverbal communication to convey a different self—one who’s compassionate and supportive? You’d likely adopt a facial expression conveying sadness and concern. You’d slow your speech rate and lower the pitch of your voice to convey empathy. You’d decrease your interpersonal distance to communicate support. And you might touch your boss lightly on the elbow or gently clasp his or her shoulder to signify caring.

As these examples suggest, nonverbal communication can help us present different aspects of our self to others. We all use nonverbal communication codes to create our identities during interpersonal encounters. An important part of being a competent nonverbal communicator is recognizing the need to shift our nonverbal communication quickly to present ourselves in different ways when the situation demands—for example, dedicated employee one moment, concerned fellow human being another.

MANAGING INTERACTIONS

Nonverbal communication also helps us manage interpersonal interactions. For example, during conversations, we use regulators, eye contact, touch, smiling, head nods, and posture shifts to signal who gets to speak and for how long (Patterson, 1988). While chatting with a friend, you probably look at him or her anywhere from 30 to 50 percent of your talk time. Then, when you’re approaching the end of your conversational turn, you invite your friend to talk by decreasing your pitch and loudness, stopping any gestures, and focusing your gaze on the other person. As your friend begins speaking, you now look at your partner almost 100 percent of his or her talk time, nodding your head to show you’re listening (Goodwin, 1981).

During conversations, we also read our partners’ nonverbal communication to check their level of interest in what we’re saying—watching for signals like eye contact, smiles, and head nods. Yet we’re usually unaware that we’re doing this until people behave in unexpected ways. For example, if a partner fails to react to something we’ve said that we consider provocative or funny, we may shoot them a glance or frown to express our displeasure nonverbally.

Nonverbal communication also helps us regulate others’ attention and behavior. For example, a sudden glance and stern facial expression from a parent or babysitter can stop a child from reaching for the forbidden cookie jar. In my sons’ school, the principal gains students’ attention by clapping loudly three times, a pattern that students then repeat back to him, falling silent afterward to listen for an important announcement.

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DEFINING RELATIONSHIPS

You’re sitting at a local diner, eating lunch and people-watching. Two couples are sitting in nearby booths. One couple sits with one partner very close to the other. They cuddle, touch, and occasionally kiss. When they’re not touching, they’re smiling and gazing at each other. The couple sitting at the next booth over is behaving very differently. The man sits up tall and straight, his arms extended on both sides of the table. He glares at his partner, interrupts her, and doesn’t look at her when she’s talking. Her eyes are downcast, her hands are folded in her lap, and she speaks softly. What does the nonverbal communication of each of these couples tell you about the degree of intimacy in their relationship? the partners’ relative dominance? A final function of nonverbal communication is to define the nature of our interpersonal relationships. In particular, we use our nonverbal communication to create intimacy and define dominance or submissiveness in our relationships (Burgoon & Hoobler, 2002).

Intimacy One crucial function nonverbal communication serves is to create intimacy, the feeling of closeness and “union” that exists between us and our partners (Mashek & Aron, 2004). For example, in her novel Written on the Body, acclaimed British author Jeanette Winterson (1993) offers a vivid and poignant description of how the nonverbal code of touch defines intimacy:

But intimacy isn’t defined solely through touch. Physical closeness, shared gaze, soft voices, relaxed postures, sharing of personal objects, and, of course, spending time together—each of these nonverbal behaviors highlights and enhances intimacy. Consider just a few specifics. Smiling and gazing are associated with intimacy (Floyd & Burgoon, 1999), something vividly illustrated in the Beaver family photo in our chapter opening. Individuals share more personal space with intimates and liked others than with strangers, and use proximity to convey affection (Floyd & Morman, 1999). Studies that have instructed people to communicate liking to others have found that the primary way people do so is through increasing gaze, smiling, and leaning forward (Palmer & Simmons, 1995). Conversely, one can communicate lack of intimacy and greater formality through distance, lack of eye contact, decreased vocal expressiveness, precise articulation, and tense postures (Burgoon & Hoobler, 2002).

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In general, more intimate relationships—particularly romantic bonds—show higher levels of nonverbal involvement across all of the codes (more eye contact, more touch, more smiling, closer distance, and so forth). For romantic couples, the level of nonverbal involvement is a direct indicator of the relationship’s health (Patterson, 1988). Think back to the highly engaged couple in the diner booth. Although you don’t know who they are, what they’re saying, or what culture they’re from, you could reasonably conclude that they have a healthy relationship, based solely on their nonverbal behavior.

Dominance and Submissiveness Recall the physically distant couple in the other diner booth. Rather than conveying intimacy, their nonverbal communication displays dominance and submissiveness. Dominance refers to the interpersonal behaviors we use to exert power and influence over others (Burgoon & Dunbar, 2000). Larger-than-normal use of space; access to other people’s space, time, and possessions; one-sided use of touch (giving more, receiving less); indirect body orientation; direct gaze and staring; frowning and scowling; and silence—all of these codes signal the dominance of the person who employs them (Carney, Hall, & Smith LeBeau, 2005). And gender has little effect—these behaviors are perceived as dominant when displayed by either men or women (Carney et al., 2005).

In contrast, submissiveness is the willingness to allow others to exert power over us. We communicate submissiveness to others nonverbally by engaging in behaviors that are opposite those that express dominance, such as taking up less space; letting others control our time, space, and possessions; smiling more; and permitting others to interrupt us.