Many of us assume that listening comes naturally. But hearing and listening are two distinct processes. Rather than being a passive activity that simply “happens” to us, listening is a complex behavior. Hearing is the physiological, largely involuntary process of perceiving sound. Hearing loss is a major condition for young and old alike, affecting over 5 million children and adolescents ages 6–19 and nearly 27 million adults ages 20–69.⁷ Being sensitive to audience members’ ability to hear you, by speaking at a rate and volume sufficient for your audience, is an important aspect of “listening” to audience members. So too is being sensitive to non-native speakers of English, who may have difficulty understanding your words because of your speech rate, articulation, and/or pronunciation patterns (see Chapter 18, “The Voice in Delivery”). But while hearing has to do with the intelligibility of sounds, listening is the conscious act of receiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken and nonverbal messages.⁸ Listening involves consciously selecting what you will listen to, giving it your attention, processing and understanding it, remembering the information, and responding to it—either verbally, nonverbally, or through both channels.⁹ During a speech, for example, speakers are highly attuned to the body language of audience members and can read a great deal from it (see Chapter 6 Checklist, “Respond to the Audience as You Speak”).

Recognize That We Listen Selectively

Can you recall sharing reactions with a friend about a guest speaker at your college or a televised speech by a politician and noticing that even though you both heard the same speaker, you formed quite different impressions? In any given situation, no two listeners will process information in exactly the same way. The reason lies in selective perception—people pay attention selectively to certain messages while ignoring others.¹⁰ Several factors influence what we listen to and what we ignore:

The idea that perceptions are, by their very nature, subject to our biases and expectations is important to remember in your dual roles as listener and speaker. As a listener, it can help you examine your expectations and motivations to hear things a certain way, and to ask yourself whether you are really hearing what the speaker is saying.

As a speaker, these principles can serve as reminders to appeal to your listeners’ experiences and backgrounds. When introducing new information, make it relevant by associating it with something with which audience members are already familiar. Consider clarifying your meaning through analogies, similes, metaphors, and other figures of speech, and help listeners visualize your ideas with presentation aids (see Chapters 16 and 20–22).

Strive for the Open Exchange of Ideas

In contrast to monologue, in which we merely try to impose what we think on another person or group of people, dialogic communication is the open sharing of ideas in an atmosphere of respect.¹² True dialogue encourages both speaker and listener to reach conclusions together. For the speaker, this means approaching a speech not as an argument that must be “won,” but as an opportunity to achieve understanding with audience members. For listeners, it means maintaining an open mind and listening with empathy.¹³ This will enable the speaker to deliver the message without impediment.