theguide11e

W1 Concise Sentences

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Sentences with redundant phrasing, wordy expressions, and unnecessary intensifiers are tiresome to read and may be difficult to understand. Concentrate on choosing words well, simplifying sentence stucture, and avoiding words that are unnecessary or evasive.

Note: Even though you may need to add detail or examples to clarify your ideas, cutting out useless words will make your writing more focused.

W1-a Eliminate redundancies and repetition.

Redundant phrasing adds unnecessary words to a sentence. Repetitive wording says the same thing twice.

Eliminate or rewrite redundant expressions.

The phrase blue in color is redundant because it repeats obvious information. Expressions such as past memories, advance planning, and mix together include modifiers that repeat information already provided in the word modified. Expressions such as the fact is true and in my opinion, I believe are redundant because they contain obvious implications.

Delete extra words from a redundant or repetitive sentence.

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W1-b Eliminate words that do not add to a sentence’s meaning.

Rewrite a wordy sentence to reduce the number of clauses and phrases.

Concentrate on turning clauses into phrases or replacing phrases, especially strings of prepositional phrases, with individual words. Sometimes you can even consolidate a series of sentences into one.

Eliminate wordy expressions.

Extra, empty words can creep into a sentence in many ways.

Here are examples of common wordy phrases and more concise alternatives.

*Wordy Phrases*	*More Concise Alternatives*
due to the fact that
in view of the fact that
the reason for
for the reason that	for, because, why, since
this is why
in light of the fact that
on the grounds that
despite the fact that	although, though
regardless of the fact that
as regards
in reference to	concerning, about, regarding
concerning the matter of
where . . . is concerned
it is necessary that
there is a need for	should, must
it is important that
has the ability to
is able to	can
is in a position to
in order to	to
for the purpose of
at this point in time	now
on the subject of	on, about
as a matter of fact	actually
be aware of the fact that	know [that]
to the effect that	that
the way in which	how
in the event that	if, when

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Rewrite a wordy sentence to simplify its structure.

Often you can express your ideas more directly and forcefully by editing to eliminate there is or there are from the beginning of a sentence, or by changing from the passive to the active voice. (See also G5–d.)

Note: Whenever possible, replace am, are, is, was, and other forms of be with a stronger verb that clearly defines an action.

W1-c Eliminate unnecessary intensifiers or hedges.

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Delete unnecessary intensifiers.

Although intensifiers such as very, really, clearly, quite, and of course can strengthen statements, eliminating them or substituting more forceful words is often more effective.

Some intensifiers are unnecessary because the words they modify are already as strong as possible, such as unique.

Eliminate unnecessary hedges.

Writers use hedges such as apparently, seem, perhaps, possibly, to a certain extent, tend, and somewhat to avoid making claims that they cannot substantiate. Hedges add subtlety to prose and acknowledge the possibility of important exceptions. Too many hedges, however, make writing too tentative.

W1-d Eliminate unnecessary prepositions.

If the word following a preposition is the object of a verb, the preposition may be unnecessary.

Another alternative is to change the verb.

FOR MULTILINGUAL WRITERS

Prepositions also combine with verbs to form two- or three-word (or phrasal) verbs whose meaning cannot be understood literally (handed in, longed for). When a preposition is part of a two- or three-word verb, it is called a particle. See T2-b.