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ORIGINAL SOURCE

Perhaps the book that has most helped us understand why low-income women would choose to have children but not marry is Kathryn Edin and Maria Kefalas’ Promises I Can Keep: Why Poor Women Put Motherhood Before Marriage (2005). According to Edin and Kefalas, the movement away from marriage, which has been profound among low-income women, is not about abandoning marriage as an ideal. They agree with [sociologist Andrew] Cherlin that marriage has great symbolic value among the poor women they interview. These women hope to marry and they want a stable two-parent family and all its trappings as much as their more advantaged peers. But it is out of reach for them.

What these women are not willing to forego [sic] is having children. If they were to wait until they had good prospects for a stable marriage, it might mean remaining childless. Children bring meaning, give purpose to life. Once they have children, they want other things in place before considering marriage. They want to have some economic independence so that they have a say in their relationships with men. They also want to make sure that the men in their lives can be trusted on a number of dimensions—trusted to put the interests of family first by getting and keeping a job, staying off drugs, staying out of jail, remaining faithful, and not physically abusing them.

From Bianchi, S. M. (2013, May 20). The more they change, the more they stay the same? Understanding family change in the twenty-first century. Contemporary Sociology, 42(3), 324-331. doi:10.1177/0094306113484700

[The source passage is from page 326.]

Excerpt from “The more they change, the more they stay the same? Understanding family change in the twenty-first century.” Contemporary Sociology, 42(3), 324–331. Reprinted by permission.

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