Revising a thesis that is too broad or too narrow

A thesis should be of sufficient scope for your assignment; it should not be too broad—it should not consider every possible angle to your argument. Nor should it be too narrow or you will find it difficult to develop an argument and support for it.

The first thesis here is too broad, with no clear focus from the “many implications.” The second thesis is too narrow—it does not make a statement that the writer can effectively argue.

Figure. The figure shows a strategy for revising a thesis. Draft thesis: Mapping the human genome has many implications for health and science. Problem: The thesis is too broad. Even in a very long research paper, you would not be able to discuss all the implications of mapping the human genome. Strategy: Consider subtopics of your original topic. Once you have chosen a subtopic, take a position in an ongoing debate and pose a question that has more than one answer. For example: Should people be tested for genetic diseases? Your thesis should be your answer to the question. Revised thesis: Although scientists can now detect genetic predisposition for specific diseases, policymakers should establish guidelines about whom to test and under what circumstances.

Figure. The figure shows a strategy for revising a thesis. Draft thesis: A person who carries a genetic mutation linked to a particular disease might or might not develop that disease. Problem: The thesis is too narrow. It does not suggest any argument or debate about the topic. Strategy: Identify challenging questions that readers might have about your topic. Then pose a question that has more than one answer. For example: Do the risks of genetic testing outweigh its usefulness? Your thesis should be your answer to this question. Revised thesis: Though positive results in a genetic test do not guarantee that the disease will develop, such results can cause psychological trauma; genetic testing should therefore be avoided in most cases.

Effective thesis statements

Exercise: Thesis statements 1

Exercise: Thesis statements 2

Related topics:

Revising a thesis that is too factual

Revising a thesis that is too vague