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 social comparison, 40
self-fulfilling prophecies, 41 self-discrepancy theory, 42 preoccupied attachment, 48 dismissive attachment, 48 |
individualistic culture, 50 collectivistic culture, 50
face, 52
mask, 52 social penetration theory, 59
self-disclosure, 63 interpersonal process model of intimacy, 63
You can watch brief, illustrative videos of these terms and test your understanding of the concepts by clicking on the VideoCentral features in the chapter. |
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- The root source of all interpersonal communication is the self; thus, understanding the self and its connection to communication is critical for improving interpersonal skills. The self is an evolving composite of self-awareness, self-concept, and self-esteem.
- During interpersonal encounters, we make sense of our selves and our communication in part by comparing our behaviors with those of others. Social comparison has a particularly pronounced impact on our sense of self when the people to whom we’re comparing ourselves are those we admire.
- When most of us think of our selves, what comes to mind is our self-concept. Our self-concept is defined at least in part through our looking-glass self. Our self-concept can sometimes trap us in self-fulfilling prophecies, although we can overcome these by analyzing our underlying beliefs about self.
- It is a daunting challenge to have positive self-esteem while living in an appearance culture dominated by images of bodily and facial perfection. Many of us have unnatural and unrealistic appearance standards. Self-discrepancy theory explains the link between these standards and our feelings about our selves, as well as ways in which we can overcome low self-esteem.
- Our self-concept and self-esteem come from many sources, one of which is gender. At the same time that our families teach us gender lessons, they also create emotional bonds with us that form the foundation for various attachment styles, including secure attachment,pre occupied attachment, dismissive attachment, and fearful attachment. These attachment styles influence our adult interpersonal relationships.
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- Many of us identify with more than one culture. As a consequence, we’re occasionally thrust into situations in which we must choose a primary cultural allegiance. Depending on whether we’re raised in a primarily individualistic culture or collectivistic culture, we learn values and beliefs about effective interpersonal communication that may differ from those of people raised in different cultures.
- The face we present to others is the self others perceive and evaluate. Sometimes our face reflects our inner selves, and sometimes we adopt masks. When we lose face, embarrassment results.
- When online, information posted about you from others has higher warranting value than what you post directly.
- Use the interview test to help you determine how to present your self online.
- According to social penetration theory, we develop relationships by gradually delving deeper and more broadly into different layers of self. The more we reveal, the more intimacy we feel with others.
- Revealing private information about our selves to others is self-disclosure and it, along with the responsiveness of listeners to such disclosure, makes up the interpersonal process model of intimacy.
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- Want to refine your critical self-reflection ability? Learn how by reviewing the steps of critical self-reflection on page 40.
- Interested in overcoming self-fulfilling prophecies that plague your communication? Try the Skills Practice on page 41.
- Ever feel as if you’re not the person you wish you could be or the person others want you to be? Find out why on pages 41–42.
- How can you improve your self-esteem and consequently your communication and relationships? Learn how by reviewing the information on pages 43–44 and completing the Self-Quiz on page 45.
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- How can you effectively maintain face during interpersonal encounters? Follow the recommendations on pages 52–54 and try the Skills Practice on page 54 for advice on making a skillful apology when you lose face.
- What can you do to maintain your desired face online? Review the suggestions described on pages 54–57; then complete the Skills Practice on page 57.
- How can you improve your self-disclosure skills? Review pages 62–69, complete the Self-Quiz on page 61, and then put your skills to the test by working through the Making Relationship Choices exercise on pages 66–67.
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